A Washington think tank has announced a breakthrough in the search for a pattern in the seemingly random US military aggression since World War II. "We think they are spelling out a message", explains an unnamed spokesperson. "If we take the first letters of Korea, Vietnam, Libya, Iraq, Iran, El Salvador, Grenada, Nicaragua and Somalia, it spells 'ELVIS _S KING'. We just need to find another 'I' country to complete the message."